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                                                                      Storm Avoidance: AC Sept. 2017

09.07.2017 We would like it to be known the exhibits that were shown, were exclusively our own. All our own, all our own.*

Hey Now!  Welcome back my friends. I bid Sweet Ti and the kits farewell in the wee hours o' the morn and headed up the DelMarVa peninsula. Erma looks to be too busy trashing FLA. to worry about hitting Virginia or New Jersey. Caught the 8:45 Cape May Ferry and by 11 a.m. Yarma and I pulled into the Harrah's Resort.  I'm here on a mission. It seems the Evil Empire is offering a player's card tier match dealio. So I've brought my Boyd's Emerald card to use to make Diamond thru Jan. 2018. Then I was gonna hit the Borg and use the Diamond card to get a MLife Gold card upgrade. On the way in I look to make sure I've got the Emerald card. Yepper, right here. But wait- the expiration date on the card says 05/31/2017. I forgot to get a new one in Vegas last May. Bag this, no sense in trying. I stop to pay for parking. Chick says $20. I told her I was only parked for a couple of minutes. She let me out for $5. I kept the ticket to use later. Cross town traffic was light. Self park is comped for Epic which is a nice perk.

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 It's not quite noon, but I went over to the Front Desk anyway to check in. Tara tells me they will text me when it's ready. I ask after the Polish Spinster Sisters. They are on vacation. Maybe Poland?  I say it's time to gambol.

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                                                            5x/10x QH Progressive

  So at this point I figure it's at least a couple of hours till the room is habitable. Road trip. The Quarter Self Park at the Trop.

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                        I had business to transact at Zephyr Gallery. These Christmas gifts don't buy themselves!

I used the parking ticket chit from Harrah's to pay and zipped north. As of now Yarma has officially gone to roost till Sunday. I grab a couple of today's NA- Claushauser Amber. The slants between the food court and the Rendezvous are available. I like the end one with the Deuces Wild logo. I start with $65. free slot play and a couple of twenties. Insert coin.

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 Those were .50 8/5 BP. Started out kinda slow- then just fizzled out altogether. I had a great time talking to today's local- Tar Heel Hat Guy. He's sitting at the next machine. He's 92 and a big Tar Heel fan. He and his wife live just up the road. We played together for a good hour. I ran out of credits and decided to get something to munch. I ordered a burger from Ruby's. I use comps. Tar Heel Hat and his wife were eating too, so I joined them. Nice diversion. 

                                                               Played some WD.

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 From there I just drifted around playing W4, Top Dollar, and Blazin'7's Prog. Nothing was happening. I walked the boards and saw this-

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                                                           Steel Pier Observation Wheel

 They are supposed to have this thing open on Oct 5th. I looks ready to go. Later in this adventure I'll post a video of it in the evening. Great lighting effects. Each pod is supposed to hold 4 to 6 people and it takes 18 minutes to go 'round. 225 ft. tall. The boardwalk isn't too busy for a lovely late summer day. Lots of helicopters launching from the pier. The surfers have set after set  coming in around 3½ ft. Sweet Ti calls at 5 p.m. after she got off work. She suggests Double Top Dollar at Hollyrock Hills. I inserted hundy and actually pushed. The I got a voice mail that my room was ready. 5:25. About time. I ferry all my shit upstairs. Nice view. 

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 I tune in the Weather Channel and check on Erma. Wow. I go back for my last session of the day. I try the dolla Blazin'7's Prog. Ugh. I stop by the front desk to ask for some shampoo and conditioner. I can't believe they don't leave conditioner anymore. The deskling said they would be there shortly, and if I left the Do Not Disrupt sign on the door that I needed to be there. I did and did. The dude showed up with a pile of stuff he hands to me. I slide him a couple of bucks. Inventory: 2 bath towels, 6 wash clothes, 4 hand towels, 3 shampoos, and a body lotion. No conditioner. I'll try again tomorrow. Meanwhile, I witness an awesome sunset.

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                    I'm about to follow the sun. It's been a long day. Down a few hundy. Earned 13 points. Laters!

09.08.2017    Double you pleasure, double your fun **

 Hey Now! 5 a.m. I give my Sweet Ti her wakey wakey call. Then I did my absolutions and restocked the BR. At 6:01 I kiosked the ol' Epic card to activate 2x comps today. Not 2x points though. But I'll take it. These days are few and far between around Resorts. I'll take what I can. I'm gonna this Double STP I found last trip. It has 9/5 DDB .25 3 play. One step away from Crack Whore. Peruvian Flake Whore. Plus I got waited on even as I inserted coin. By 2 Eastern European CWs.  

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 This machine has got everything I'm looking for in VP. It's a slant. Perfect for doubling as a bar top and a desk to scribble left handed trip notes. It's got a free standing chair. Critical for creature comfort. And the game is an endorphin rush. Let's join the action Jim-



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                                      Well that was exciting. Or at least had the potential to be. 

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                                                    Endorphin Trigger Jimmy????





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           I've been sending Sweet Ti screenshots. She tells me to cash out that puppy. Will do. Insert fresh hundy.

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                                                      Where's that spinner???

 I always seem to have luck here in the morning. Which is about the only time I play in this area. It's just between the Epic/Paramount Club and the 5 o'clock everywhere bar. I tends to get very blue air when the joint gets busy. Thick. I hit Hollyrock Hills and try some slots. Triple Double Red Hot 7's 9 line dollar ate a hundy. 2x/5x/10x Bonus Times ate another. Bag this. W4? Pushed. Beer break upstairs.

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                                                       chilly morning in AC

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 I've never really paid much attention to these .25 Blazin' 7s Progressives. But after that profitable session, I might. I need sustenance, so I check out Familgia Pizza. They are running a special- 2 slices and a drink for 7.77. I'll take it. 

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 Pretty good, actually. Comps. It's just past noon. That means today's free play is available. My game plan is to hit the VP slants and hope for the best. But they are too smokey for me. I'll try the uprights. Let's see what they are offering today-

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                                    Cool, 85. will work. I think I'll start with some .50 BP.

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               Damn it to hell, should have gone with the DDB. So I do. Let's pick up the action Jim......  


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                                                      Let's bump it up to sawbucks-

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                                                        Down to .50 BP

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                                                    Up to Triple Boner Dollars-   

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                                                once again, wrong game. But still 600.

       And time to cash out that puppy and go aloft to make a safe deposit. Back to the action, I try some Lock it Link. Insert coin.

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                                                     166.05 line hit on a 2.50 bet.

  Noice! So I up the denomination to .10 and end up with a push. Time for an assortment of slots. I.C.

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 Sweet Ti tells me to try some Top Dollar Premium. 5. a hand. I never got a decent offer, had much better luck at Suncoast in May. While I was playing, next to me was today's local, Blonde Chick. Never did get her name. She had hit the max bonus on these machines the other day. 5k. Next to her was a lady who hadn't ever played this game before. We did our best to help her out and cheer each other on. Fun, and I ended up pushing. Then I tried the new Simpsons machine. Talk about pitiful payouts. Flintstones treated me about the same. Time to take care of some business. I need to restock the fridge in the room and ice down the cooler in Yarma. I've got a plan.

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 Resorts has really nice laundry bags. They hold about 10 lbs. of ice. Ice down, Kalaber and bottled water up. Works every time.

 Back at the uprights, the one I was playing is busy. Along with the entire frilling casino. The Bus Crowd is thick. I find one and insert coin.

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 This one deals seriously slow. But it's kinda mesmerizing. Like playing in slow motion. I call my Sweet Ti for our usual Friday 5 p.m. "Welcome to our Weekend" call. Once again, she is picking up her sister Marie to spend the weekend with her. That makes me happy, she won't have to be alone. Not that our house is lonely with 5 cats hanging around. All of our menagerie are permanent inside felines. Meow!!!! I have to admit that I miss sitting at the Wally Gator Bar next to my Sweet Ti playing VP at the shorty machines. Hell, I just miss being with my Sweet Ti. The rest of the evening didn't go so well. Seems like no matter where I inserted coin, my credits ended up like this-


 I grab another pizza special- I do like my pizza- and cut my losses and call it a night. I managed a small profit for the day. Plus I earned about a hundy in comps. And a grand total of 19 points. Which isn't bad considering all the VP I played. 

09.09.2017 In the Ferris Wheel on top, if I ever reach her. ***

Hey Now! Up at 5:30. I always like to scan the city for the obligatory blue flashing lights. There they are, over by the ghetto. I also notice there's quite a line of taxis and ride share vehicles lined up on South Carolina Ave.Never realized before that there's some kind of tatty club there. Let's Gaggle it, shall we? Lace Gentleman's Club. Bikini Bar? Must be an AC thingy. I fire up the Ippy and the Blueteeth speaker, dial up some My Morning Jacket. Great showering music. Well looky there, Mr. Sun made an appearance.  The sets and coming in nicely, and I check out some surfers taking advantage of Erma's power.

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                                                             Time to GAMBOL!

                                               That .25 Blazing 7's Progressive is now over 300. and I give it a shot. I.C.

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 One interesting aspect to this ancient game is the fact that you can't see dollar amounts anywhere on this machine. Everything is in credits except that jackpot amount. I keep grinding out these wins to keep plodding along. Then the magic finally happens. Jimmy????



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                                                           World's Smallest Handpay


Well, the jackpot only grows a penny per spin. By my calculations, that means there was 4182. cycled thru this machine between jackpots. I'm just chock a block full of interesting facts and useless information. Today's local Barbara paid me. Barbara and I have a history. A couple of years ago she helped me out when I had a problem with a TITO payout. It's a long story. Babs used to work the same shift with a great friend of ours, Mignon. But Mignon got the ol' Resorts Shaft and had her shifts sliced and diced. Barbara tells me that she only works now when other people call in sick. That's just plain wrong. Between Mignon and what they did to our previous Host Martha, it's hard to have warm and pleasant feelings about Resorts and Mohegan Sun. Just to recap the Martha saga, she has lung cancer. While she was recovering- and cancer free, they canned her. Just plain wrong. Poor thing. We still stay in touch. Our new Host, Shaunda, is okay I guess. But Martha was the best. End of rant. I cashed out my remaining credits and sought new fertile pastures. Double Spinners.

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 Just couldn't pull the pop top on any of those, especially that 15x. Bummer. Once again I got smoked out. Time for a change.

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                                                       720 ways to lose your money.

Sweet Ti gives me a ring. The girls are easing their way into their Saturday. I axk her to pick a machine. Her response please Jim-



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                                                         Thanks for the tip Sweet Ti Darlin'!

                                                        Roll the 50's vintage footage James-



                                                          Craptacular Bonus!

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         While I'm over here in the MVille Casino area- such as it is- I think I'll try Lock it Link one more time. Fire it up Jim!


                                                              Nice win.

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In the background there are a nice couple rooting me on. Once again I hear another story of a big win on the machine that I'm playing. Just not me. Cash out. By my notes I see that I next went over by Bar None and played some Top Dollar. It's a damn good thing I take notes. I got 75. as a first offer. I'll take it. Yet another person tells me he hit the 1k bonus on this game yesterday. Yadda yadda yadda, good for him. I cashed out a 40. profit. Time to try the Blazin' 7's Prog. Dollar Style.

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                                                              2 hundy profit  

 Feed me Seymour!  I ordered me up some Ruby's to go. I played some VP slants while I waited and scored a couple on boats. +45.

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  I checked in with Sweet Ti after I ate. They are binging on Netflix. There is all kinds of activity going on around me here upstairs. Mona and her partner are doing their best to break the bed next door while across the hall the Jersey Punk Boys are jamming the rap and I suppose impressing each other by doing on hand push ups in the hallway. They all have on skin tight white tee shirts. I'm impressed. I also notice there's no girls around. Enough of that. Time to hit the floor now that I am thoroughly disgusted. 

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                                                               112. line hit 

 Wolf Run is a tough nut to crack. Cost me a hundy. Top Dollar Premium, offers of 50./40/120. Pushed. Triple Double Diamond 2. 2 credit ate yet another hundy. Which means the ol' BR is fresh out of them. In my pocket at least. BUT, it's well into the afternoon, and as we all know, or you will know now since I'm telling y'all, free slot play instigates here at noon. I head for the slants, which are full. Onward to the uprights. Insert card.

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   How in the world they come up with these strange amounts I'll never know. Today's CW here is Lottie. But Lottie isn't a hottie.

                                                                 .50 DDB

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                                                           sorry, flip phone pic. 

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Of course I had switched over to Bonus Poker. Story of my life. Or at least this particular trip. After that hit I fed in my last 40. to keep it going. Gone. Break time once again. I ice down Yarma's cooler and restock the room one last time. Back to the action. Jim???



          Over to Hollyrock Hills I played some Double Top Dollah. Had a couple of 60. hits and parleyed to 2. That's 18./spin. 

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 Parleyed to 5. but never had an offer. I stayed too long at the fair and ended up with a push.  Drifted around making smallish donations to the Tribe. At the kiosk, I see that I still haven't used my 50. Celebration Dinner annual award. Sweet Ti & I are planning on coming back here for NYE, but not before. And the anniversary date for my Epic card is early in December. That means the dinner will run out before we get back. I don't think so. I make my game plan. Breadsticks for dinner, and use that puppy up. Aloft I get cleaned up and notice the Miss America parade making it's way south on the boardwalk. It's mobbed down there. I ease my way down to the restaurant. I stop by the cashier to make sure the 50. is active. She says that it is. They aren't terribly busy. I will be Blonde Kathy's customer. She's called Blonde Kathy because 3 girls named Kathy that work here. And she is the only Blonde. Are y'all keeping up? I tell B.K. about my desire to use up my comp. Everything on the menu is very reasonably priced. I end up ordering the Sirloin Steak and a club sandwich to go for the trip home tomorrow. 47.50 after tax. Perfect.

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 Very tasty. While I was waiting for my steak, I walk look outside and see the parade has ended. The restaurantis on the 2nd floor overlooking the boards. Too bad there were no tables open near the windows, Let's take a look at that new wheel Jimmy-





 If it was a bit darker outside the lights would stand out better. Here at Breadsticks, you take your bill to the cashier yourself. I tipped Blonde Kathy 40% and made my way up. Or tried to. The line doesn't appear to be moving. Only one cashier is open, and she is having problems settling the bill for these 3 chicks, one of them in a Rascal. Meanwhile, the natives are getting restless. Finally some dude shoes up and opens the other register. I finally am next and tell him to please use the 50. comp on my card. He says nothing and rings me up. I sign for it and put the receipt in the bag with my sammich. I go to Yarma with my food. I once again chatted with my Sweet Ti, just to tell her how much I missed her. You long time readers will remember that I like to end each trip with a 4OAK for my last hand. I have 2 hundy left to gambol with. The rest is going home with me. Luckily for me my fav slant is open. The one with the Deuces Wild faceplate. Wherever in the casino they move this on to I manage to find it. I start our with .50 BP but blow thru a hundy and end up at quarters.

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And with that I cash out. I stop by a kiosk to see how many points I've earned today. The gaming machines don't tell you. 23 points today. It's so much easier to earn points playing slots. I also see that the Celebration Dinner comp is still on the card. Plus my comps are down around 50. Dudeish screwed up. I hit the player's card to get it taken care of. The girl there verifies that's what happened, BUT, I have to go to the restaurant to get it taken care of. Bummer. The player's club is all the way in the rear of the joint. Breadsticks is way at the other end. I get there and ask the girl if she remembers me. She does. I tell her about the dude's mistake. She tries to fix it, but needs the manager to make it happen. He's busy right now. So I wait. Like 15 minutes. He finally shows up. Guess who it is. Yepper, the same dude. He fixes it and never apologizes or even looks at me. Idiot. The girl does. Whatever. I stop by the food court and order a Häagen Dazs Sundae.

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 Up on the 46th, I enjoy my treat and pack. It's been fun. For the trip I earned 55 points, and close to 2 hundy in comps. The BR came out 2 hundy ahead. I crashed and had the alarm set for Plaid. I slept quickly and used comps for the dreaded 15. a night resort fee. Cash for the 5. a night tax. Caught the 7 a.m. ferry and was home by kickoff. Thanks for coming along y'all!!!!

                                       NEXT UP: HALLOWEEN IN VEGAS PART IV

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                                P.S. Meanwhile these guys are STILL following me around. Spooky!

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                                                    * Karl Evil by Emerson, Lake and Palmer

                                                    ** Doublemint gum commercial jingle

                                                    *** Ferris Wheel by Donovan